Thursday 31 January 2008

Clare's detox diary - update 4 - Friday 1st 2008

The good news is that another week has passed and I am still not doing it. The bad news is that I really want to do it. The official end date is Monday 4th February, but seeing as I have got this far I am probably not going to do it....until Friday 8th February. But every cloud has a silver lining because this is my last blog on the subject, until next year that is….

I am still not completely sure why I have subject myself to such torture, but there is obviously something driving me on to do this. What could it be? .....to prove I can, ….to lose weight? ….to experience uninterrupted sleep? …..Or was it just to collect lots of lovely comments about my glowing complexion and bright eyes, which incidentally make me sound a bit like a Labrador, but hey, they are great compliments and much appreciated. However, it does also beg the question that if I'm looking great now, by definition, does that mean I was looking completely crap when drinking my body weight on a daily basis? …….and please, if you are even thinking about responding to that – don’t.

Wednesday proved to be the biggest challenge of the week, when I was at the annual Finexpo conference held in the Brewery in Chiswell Street… Of course attending an event held in a Brewery, when you are on the wagon, is probably not the best place to be. But I soldered on and resisted the drinks which flowed freely, despite a couple of people trying to force me to break my resolve, by waving glasses of white wine under my nose. Tough luck chaps, nice try, but it’s been tried before and it’s failed before.

After the show, a few of us went on to the drinks party hosted by Ian Chester and Les Gosling from COG the recruitment consultants. There we were joined by David Bannister, editor of Banking Technology magazine who hardly ever turns up at these events these days, so we were honoured. But now I am not so sure because he mentioned that he was publishing a little titbit in the Out of Office section in the next edition of Banking Technology about a certain PR person and her inexplicable infatuation with David Beckham! so I can’t wait to see that. Others there included the lovely John Quamina from IBM. John Bertrand and his beautiful daughter who looks a lot like Scarlett Johanssen, and all the Message Automation guys, including Christian Nentwich who told me another one of his jokes…..which sadly went straight over my very sober head - again! What is it with me drinking water and not getting jokes?

After that humiliation, I decided it was time to leave. Although not before Leonie Alsop from Wall Street Systems and I had a very interesting conversation with the gorgeous Jerry Gossage from FNS which involved us potentially accosting him in the forest on the way home – not sure where that came from or if it qualifies as sexual harassment Jerry….. and, if it does, well who cares.

Thursday evening was a great night out, dining with Jeff Hudson the CEO of Vhayu, John Coulter head of everything strategic and marketing, together with Zoe and Chanda from Metia. The food was great and the company even better. I was drinking tea as usual... but the bonus was that we had a waiter who was a ringer for Jermain Defoe who plays for Tottenham and was very cute, so that made up for the lack of drinking, on my part anyway.

The absolute highlight of my week though was West Ham beating Liverpool at Upton Park on Wednesday evening. I know it was a last minute penalty but who cares, we bagged the points and that’s all that matters.

Seeing as this is the last tales from the wagon, I am not handing out raspberries this week - I can’t be bothered. However, the largest cherry in the pie has to go to the lovely Phin Smith (aka the LurveGod). Phin stayed with me every step of the way and who, luckily for him, completes his non drinking season today. I am sure he will be out on the lash tonight, and I did also hear a rumour that Pat Dolan from Aquin may join him, so it could be messy.

So…..that’s it from me for another year. One thing I have proved is that being on the wagon does not mean not going out. However it can get pretty boring sometimes, I know because I have almost bored myself to death a few times over the period. But as we all know there’s no gain without pain and luckily for me, after next week I am open to offers for lunch and dinners complete with wine of course

Thank you for sharing the journey with me, and for your messages of support. It really did help knowing that you are out there spurring me on, almost as much as knowing I would never hear the end of it if I did not complete the task in hand. That helped a lot.


And finally please don’t forget my charity, www.jordanjaytrust.com and make a donation if you can, but only if you can. Thanks again, have a great year, and above all, have fun xx

Thursday 24 January 2008

Clare's detox diary - update 3 - Friday 25th January 2008

Heloooo everyone

Another week passes and not a drop has passed my lips, so all is well in my world. And I am happy to report that I am feeling much better now and nearly back to my normal self. However, I must just clear up one misunderstanding, I had Menieres disease, not to be confused with Moule Marineres disease – an easy mistake to make, and one made by many, not least Kevin Galliers from Sungard amongst others.

This week has been pretty quiet for me, as I continue to be shunned by many of my fair-weather friends. I did, however, enjoy a very pleasant lunch with Neill Vanlint and Hugh Stewart from Goldensource except that while Hugh and I stuck to black coffee and English breakfast tea respectively, Neill imbibed in more than one glass of gorgeous looking Sauvignon Blanc, which we both thought was pretty selfish of him considering……

Sadly, my colleague Jon Angeloni, joins the ever growing band of losers in the non drinking stakes. But he is in illustrious company, including the likes of George Collier, Michael Aldridge, and Daniel Simpson. Jon fell off the wagon on Friday – his excuse is that he had a bad day at work – how crap is that. Apparently he climbed right back on the next day, but unhappily for him, the only way to qualify for the non drinkers award, is to do another 30 days straight – so the $64K question is, are you up to the challenge Jon? I also heard that George Collier got completely trashed on Wednesday night and was so hungover on Thursday, he declared that he was never drinking again… I must be really mean, because I am secretly pleased when I think about him suffering from a horrendous hangover.

On a happier note....trusty Ben Jarrold is still shunning the evil weed, which is a great effort. Phin Smith at Citadel, continues to fly the flag and would not be tempted by the demon drink even when he was taken out for a welcome drink by his new employers. That shows real strength of character, keep up it up Phin…..not long to go now. I am also pleased to welcome Chanda, another fellow Metian, to the 2008 non drinkers club. Chanda has quietly been doing her own detox but was outted by Zoe Graystone on Wednesday, so I had to give her a special mention.

Paul Gow from CJC, is truly a man on a mission, not only is he off the booze, but he is about to cut out eating altogether and is stepping up his gym visits. A complete turnaround from the pre-Christmas lush I used to know and one who made a significant contribution to my own over-consumption during this period - just kidding, Paul. I am seriously impressed with your keep fit regime.

Finexpo 2008
In the Fintech world a major event is on the horizon, in the shape of the annual Finexpo exhibition and conference which is being held at the Brewery on Wednesday 30th January. And as usual, my email inbox and voicemail is overflowing with requests, indeed pleas, from people asking me to get them into the event for free. Look guys you all know the rules, so what part of no don’t you all understand. Even I get vetted, so what chance have you lot got 

But I will be there and I will also be taking advantage of the after Finexpo drinks in the pub across the road from the show. This year the drinks are being sponsored by Ian Chester and Les Gosling from that well known recruitment firm COG. I am completely gutted because it’s the first time I have ever been invited to a COG party and I can’t take advantage of the free drinks on offer - a total bummer.

Answers on a postcard please
Almost there, if anyone knows the origins of the saying…… I’m on or off the wagon, please post your answer on the blog. I will donate some extra £ssss to the charity for the right answers and any other amusing ones – but try and keep them clean.
Paul Foley is not eligible to enter because he knows the answer already…… or does he…….?

A whitewash at White Hart Lane
Despite the fact I am a dyed in the wool West Ham fan, I cannot let Arsenal's 5 - 1 drubbing by Spurs pass without comment. Their excuse for the abysmal performance was that they did not field their top team, whatever....Arsenal were completely outclassed by Tottenham who were inspired, and deserved the victory.

A little help from your friends
..... and just in case any of you Gooners out there need counselling to overcome this unexpected defeat, just call the free helpline on 0800 515151, where trained advisors are on hand to taunt you throughout this difficult period!

Finally, don’t forget www.jordenjaytrust.co.uk – and as always do what you can, but only if you can. Have a great week, and take heart... you only have one more of these to go, bet you're counting the days!.

Saturday 19 January 2008

An ode from Anne

I thought I would share this response with you all. This little ode was penned for me by my very best friend in the world, Anne Richardson. Anne suffered a pretty severe heart attack in May 2007. Actually it was on the day that West Ham beat Manchester United at Old Trafford and stayed in the premier division, so I remember it well. I was so delighted about the result - just kidding, it was a very scary time, but she is much better now and obviously the attack has not affected her ode writing capabilities.

Thanks Anne for these kind words, Anne is the best ode writer I know, along with Daryl Dent. We all love an ode, hope you enjoy it.

This is an ode to for my mate Clare
Who’s got a disease called Meniere
Like Kylie she’s been spinning around
Throwing up and hitting the ground

Are you quite sure she’s on the wagon?
‘Cos it looks like she has drunk a flagon
And just one thing she must beware…..
It could deflate that magnificent pair

Penned by the bird with dodgy ticker
Who currently looks a lot less sicker

Author Anne Richardson - Friday 18th January 2008

Thursday 17 January 2008

Detox Diary - update 2 - Friday 18th January 2008

Hello all

So here we are again, still firmly perched on the wagon which is the good news.

The bad news is that I arrived back from New York last Sunday, only to be struck down on Monday morning, by an acute attack of Meniere’s Disease. It’s a particularly unpleasant condition which is triggered by an ear imbalance that amongst other things, disorients the brain. So trust me to get an acute attack on my first outing. One of the symptoms is extreme dizziness, and you lose all coordination, so an amusing aspect of this unhappy episode was that even though it was only 7.15 am, I did a very good, .....no indeed, a spectacular impression of a very drunken person,…… as I bounced off the walls and wobbled all over the place, when I tried to walk.

Of course, everyone immediately assumed the worst, and since then I have been subjected to an enormous amount of stick from some very unsympathetic people, the common theme being that I was probably suffering from an acute lack of alcohol rather than being acutely unwell, which I was! My particular favourite was the suggestion from Darren Bishop at VCMpartners, that I had probably over indulged in too much naked Twister over the Christmas period, so thank you for that Darren - very amusing – not!.

Actually it’s a pretty nasty condition and it was all a bit scary. But I am sure that those of you who do care, will be pleased to hear that I am slowly on the mend and should be back in full circulation next week.

Who say's there's no such thing as an alcohol free lunch or dinner?
I have to say that I was completely overwhelmed by the response to last week’s detox diary. I was particularly touched by all the offers of alcohol free lunches and dinners that came flooding in, after being so cruelly dumped by the likes of Karim, Howard, Ken and Nick Daniel. These offers did go some way in helping to soothe my battered confidence, and I am looking forward to catching up with you all very soon.

Onto the raspberries, the first of which sadly, goes to........me, for calling Jon Angeloni in our London office - Jon Archangeli. Sorry Jon, I know I really should know your name by now having worked with you for over 18 months, but look on the bright side, there are worst things that could happen to a person than being confused with the very foxy Jennifer Archangeli, who runs the Metia office in Singapore. And raspberries are winging their way to Michael Aldridge from Expand in New York and Daniel Simpson from Citadel, both of whom declared their intention to stay off the sauce for a month, and have both failed miserably. You’re either on the wagon or not, falling off for a lost weekend, and then climbing back on again just doesn't count. Its 30 days straight chaps.

The biggest raspberry of all though however, has to go to George Collier, who despite his great intentions, threw in towel after a couple of days. He said that when he succumbed, he then looked up and sadly, ……the wagon had gone……… and that was that!. However I am very happy to report that the stalwart Phin Smith is staying with me on the straight and narrow. Good job Phin.

This weeks cherries go to a sterling group of January abstainers.

To super trooper Ben Jarrold for keeping off the evil weed and who, within a two week period, has cut out a massive 250 cigarettes and has saved enough money to treat himself to a superdooper pair of new trainers. Now that is impressive. And to Jon Angeloni, in order to stave off the white wine cravings, is chomping through his bodyweight in Quality Street chocolates,… but is still hanging on in there….albeit by the skin of his teeth.

A round of applause goes to Thea George from the A-Team and her husband for continuing to fly the flag and to Mary Peters, who is really going for gold because she has given up both cigarettes and drinking, now that is really tough. To Tony Armour from BearingPoint, Hugh Stewart from Goldensource, who has done this before and to Hugh Richards, who has £100.00 bet on his efforts, all deserve a mention. And to Paul Gow from CJC, who is also on the detox bandwagon and by all accounts is winning the battle to regain his six pack physique. Paul also celebrated his birthday yesterday, Happy Birthday Paul. And one last cherry has to go to Mike Seppi in New York for bucking the trend and continues to drink during January. Mike, we’re proud of you.

So apart from being struck down by a mystery illness, one of my esterwhile non drinking partners falling off his wagon, and West Ham losing, 1 -0 to Manchester City, against the line of play, I might add, in this weeks FA cup qaulifying game, not much going on really.

In terms of the charities, this year, its just the Jordan Jay trust. http://www.jordanjaytrust.com/. Please take a moment to read the site, and you will understand why it is so important to support this amazing family. I have met Jordan and Jasmine’s mother and I was so impressed by her courage and commitment, so do what you can, but only if you can.

That’s it from me for this week. Thank you again for all your messages of support, even the vaguely insulting ones. They really do help to spur me on and I love hearing from you all. Have a great week whatever you do.

Wednesday 16 January 2008

Detox Diary - Update 1 - Friday 11th January 2008

Helooo everyone,
So far so good, I decided to bring my detox hell forward and started 3 days early on Friday 4th January so I am a week into this already and staying on track. Right now I am in New York – where having more than two beers is often viewed as being on the edge of binge drinking so I am in a good place. And I have resorted to drinking lots of tea. But sadly tea here leaves a lot to be desired and…… as I have always said - there a couple of things that you can’t get in New York……one is a really good cup of tea, and the other…. ……well…..the people who know me really well - know the answer to that one!

People keep asking me why I am putting myself through such torture, well apart from all the beneficial health crap etc. etc., it was because I nearly scared myself to death when, a couple of days before Christmas I looked in the mirror and thought, bugger me who is that!, …she looks familiar, I have definitely seen her before – but couldn’t quite place that grey, saggy, baggy looking excuse for a face and then thought….……shit it’s me! Need I say more J
This non drinking lark can be lonely place so I am especially pleased that both George Collier from Siperian and Phin Smith from Citadel have signed up with me again. George actually tried to start on the 1st January but gave up on the 2nd, but then he got back on the wagon again and is going for gold - I hope. And I know I can rely on Phin to stay the course. There are also a couple of other new joiners this year, Jon Archangeli and Ben Jarrold from Metia London. In Jon’s own words he is struggling with the programme but is hanging on in there. And Ben has quit smoking – not drinking – which I think must be a very tough call, Ben’s mantra is ….quitting smoking is for life! We will watch their progress with interest and good luck chaps.

As always, I have a few raspberries to dish out. My first goes to Jaime Wong in the Metia HR department - who before Christmas said that she would be off the sauce for the whole of January and actually lasted a whole 4 days – total rubbish Jaime J

And some extremely large raspberries are winging their way to the people who invited me out to lunch and dinner next week and then decided to postpone these engagements until February as soon as I said I was on the wagon. Do you guys realise just how hurtful this rejection is, because it obviously means that without the addition of lots of white wine, I am obviously not the highly entertaining and scintillating company that I thought I was – ho hum.

Breaking news, bloody Nick Daniel has just done exactly the same thing, he just called me, invited me out to lunch next week and then backtracked – what is that all about!

In terms of my charities, I have not made the final selection yet, but will do by next week. As always any contributions you make are completely voluntary and confidential so don’t feel obliged. And if you don’t want to receive this drivel each week, just let me know and I will take you off the list.

I know there are quite a few people out there who are abstaining for the month January, good luck to you and have good week. Next update Friday 18th January. Bet you can’t wait J